The Irony Of Landers

Yesterday Julie and I took a field trip out to Landers in the Mojave desert. On the way there, I told Julie that I knew nothing about Landers except that it had a big fault line that resulted in a really big earthquake way back a few years. The purpose of our field trip was two fold; Julie needed to get an orchid re-potted at Gubler's and I wanted to see the Integratron.

We started off at Gubler's Orchids where there is a big sign posted that you must wear closed toed shoes if you want to tour the greenhouses. The tour turned out to consist of a guy walking us around and pointing to plants. The answer to most of our questions was "I don't know." The woman behind the desk refused to smile and barked at Julie when she wasn't immediately ready when our "tour guide" arrived. Let's just say it is probably better for these people to work with flowers than with people.

How do I describe the Integratron? Well, to start, here's a picture:




You would have to go on the website to get the full history but let's just say it's an energy machine where you can go and take a sound bath. Unfortunately, it was closed and they called us back too late to take a tour but I am grateful that I just got to see it and the viewing lived up to my expectations.

We left Julie's orchid in the care of the flower loving, people hating employees at Gubler's and headed even further into the Mojave desert through Johnson County, a homestead community and some unadulterated desert, Joshua trees, rock formations, rock formations with graffiti, old homestead homes, two lane highway with no stolen water greenery. Our destination was Lucerne Valley where we wanted to do some thrift store shopping and have lunch.

We immediately found Jody's Pre Loved Goods. Pay dirt. And not just because of the merchandise. Jody was there with two of her buddies. These ladies were probably in their 70's and one of them was on the cell phone having a conversation I recognized. "How big was it?" "Was anyone hurt?" "Where was it centered?" "We felt it here."

Apparently as Julie and I were driving there was this earthquake. I can't imagine being anywhere safer than that desolate desert highway.

When she got off the phone, the woman said to the other ladies, "The guy next door to my sister has played the same song every day for the last 15 years."

"What song is it?"

"A Lee Ann Rimes song."

"Couldn't be Lee Ann Rimes. She hasn't been around for 15 years. Must be Patsy Cline. Lee Ann sounds like Patsy Cline."

Their conversation soon turned to other things.

"I wish there was a place for singles to meet in this town," one of them sighed. "It would be nice to go dancing, meet someone to have dinner with."

The other ladies offered her some advice at which point the conversation went back to earthquakes versus tornadoes and how one of their sisters slept through a tornado one time and some story about a baby ending up miles away in a tree. They realized that they should have known an earthquake was coming because the ants have been acting strange. They decided that in the earthquake versus tornado contest that earthquakes rule.

After we made our purchases (I bought nine silver bracelets for $4.00. They may not really be silver but they make a nice clanging sound), we asked them for a lunch place recommendation and they sent us down the street to an awesome Chinese place where they said people come all the way from Apple Valley to eat. I'm not sure where Apple Valley is but impressive, yes?



On the way back to my casita, we stopped in Yucca Valley at my favorite coffee house, Water Canyon Coffee Company. Yucca suddenly seemed like a big, booming town compared to Landers and Lucerne Valley. Perspective.

My New Gig As A Back Model

Here I am back at my desert paradise. At this moment, I am sitting outside on the huge, private patio of my casitas, sipping coffee, reading and getting ready to go to the spa in Palm Springs where I will take a fitness class, sink into one of their deep bathtubs, and then rest with cucumbers on my eyes in the quiet room.

Yesterday when I arrived Julie and I opened a bottle of champagne and the she asked me if I would model a jacket for her Etsy store. The jacket is a gorgeous green with a mink fur collar. The problem was that it was a little snug in the front. But she thought it looked good from the back and then she remembered this handbag she wanted to sell. So here I am modeling the back of a jacket and a nice big pocket book....







You see that pearl bracelet I'm wearing? Someone already commented on Julie's Flickr page that it makes for a perfect accessory to the jacket. I brought it myself to the photo shoot. I am a full service back model!